I thought it would pass, by the end of the summer… You know that feeling of: overwhelm, exhaustion, general fogginess and loss of centre….
Yes that feeling!
On reflection, I have been on a fast train to destination ‘new career,’ since I left physiotherapy in 2011/2012. Psychologically, I have not given myself a break to grieve and re-centre myself. For the last 2 years, I have continuously up-skilled and familiarised myself with social media and business, despite uncomfortable comfort zone stretch ickiness….
I have pushed, pushed and pushed again through it…
Since September 2013, I thought I had finally reached ‘Destination know what I am doing and why!’.
No, actually, I do know what I am doing and why, as I have found an area of work where the alchemy of client meets artist is extremely rewarding.
But, I forgot myself in all this. I lost touch with me. Or perhaps I just needed time to drop the old identities and re-create new ones; ones that could evolve in an unattached, connection with self kinda way!
But no, I had to keep pushing and pushing and now I am struggling to show up, as I am yet to find my authentic voice. You know the one…where you can connect with me and get exactly what I do and why I do it. The bit that helps to nourish me in my business. Sound familiar?
You see, I am not comfortable with the ‘Cookie Cutter’ business advice that is out there. It just does not suit me at all. And, boy, have I tried to take it on board.
So, I am still here running my business and services. Nothing has changed there. I am just not showing up much in the online and face-to-face world, whilst I get in touch with who I am and how I want to feel and be in my business. You get that, right?
I am exploring other ways to do business which I hope to share with you soon.
This is a temporary dropping of my anchor (thank you Joey Clifton for this beautiful gift in the post today), to find my authentic business voice and I will come back and hopefully light you up 😉
Thank you for reading my blog today and I look forward to connecting with you soon.
I feel you. I seem to be in the same place. Great to hear from you, though! Sending you positive thoughts and hoping that you reach the place you want and need, when you are ready 🙂
Renata recently posted…Choose what you put into your body – Visual Reminder #15
Hey Renata!!! Lovely to see you here! This seems to be a familiar story…. There has to be a better way for us, right? I am hopeful that taking space and time rather than just following instructions, is the way forward… Power to us all who are jumping off the Cookie Cutter Bandwagon ;)xxxxxx
I love, not only your art, but your honesty. And I can totally relate to what you are writing about. I recently unsubscribed to so many emailing list because I was suffering from info overload about marketing. Totally wiped out by the last few months and having a break from it all and feeling ok about it. Luckily the universe seems to be providing anyway.
I am really looking forward to find out what path you are taking next… and just remember that you do amazing art so…that speaks for itself most of the time…just share that with us! 😉
Oh Giusi , it sounds like you hit the wall on marketing overload too.. I am so glad the universe is still providing and it seems to be helping me out too….so, I wonder whether being more resonant in our business will reap even more rewards for all concerned 😉 thank you xxxxxxx
Lisa, thankyou for this breath of fresh air. (And your openness!)
I love your phrase ” get in touch with who I am and how I want to feel and be in my business” – that’s how I feel too, and your post and another I read today have confirmed that’s a priority for me too.
It’s the Universe telling me to slow down, smell the roses and feel my way into being more authentic in my business – in all ways (and that includes the type of marketing messages I pay attention to)
Looking forward to hearing more from you when the time is right – and wishing you blissful reconnection to yourself and the way you do business.
So honoured to be taking this journey with you and excited by the possibilities!
Thank you and I have to say that the Clarity session we had the other day really confirmed to me how hard aspects of me are behaving towards me: the inner critic banter! It was a key ingredient to me taking my foot off the accelerator peddle. I can now breathe life into my business and see who I really am, so that I can support my tribe more effectively whilst living and injecting life into my business and into me (rather than existing in my business)!!
Hi Lisa! Your post certainly resonated with me. I have been on a very similar path and timeline as you. I made a fairly dramatic shift in career in 2011, when I turned my hobby/passion into my full time business. I am also on the learning/discovery process of taking my business online, and finding a way to do that as ‘me’. I am a fairly private and introverted person which made this all feel a little more daunting. However, as time goes by, I find more and more people of a similar mindset, and I also feel more and more at home online. My biggest lesson: it just takes waaayyyy longer that I expected. With time, patience, support of each other, and honest shares like what you have posted here, we’ll all find our online homes and voices!
Your work is beautiful and necessary! Thank you for sharing!
Oh Nikki, Thank you for your kindness and also mirroring the difficulties of being more introverted… I am overall mindful of my energy levels in my personal life, but I somehow did not apply it to my work and got caught up in the busyness of business…thinking it essential whilst my productiveness just ebbed away!
When I step back, I feel relief and that has to be a good thing, right? There is something in this lesson I am learning about ‘simplicity’… and heart-felt resonance with business activities
We all need to stick together and build this thriving online community..;).xxx
How I love you Lisa! And isn’t it interesting how so many of us who are heart-centered struggle with the manly and annoying marketing out there? I’m in that boat myself. I feel like it’s hitting me over the head all of the time. There has to be another way. I’m so glad you’re still creating and nourishing yourself through that. I’m excited to hear what your new endeavors are! xoxo
There has to be another way!!…a way us heart-centred solopreneurs can all connect and flourish in the most delicious environment 😉 I pictured you with a blow-up hammer, hitting your head, whilst sitting in a boat and then handing the hammer to me and I hit my head and then we roll about laughing!!!! xxxxx
Great post Lisa! Thank you!
Oh thank YOU Mary… It always feels like I am riding the vulnerability train when I admit how things really are …. thank you xx
Wonderful post, Lisa, and I’m sure it will resonate with many of your readers.
Obviously we do have to learn about sales and marketing as new business owners, but it’s so easy to get caught up in comparisons and ‘shoulds’ and lose ourselves in that, as you say.
Time to come back to centre, process the information you’ve gathered and then apply it ‘inside-out’ in your own unique way – which I’m sure will be totally awesome! (just like your artwork).
Can’t wait to see what comes next 🙂
Thank you Linda and I also see the value in tapping my way through this ;)…. Amazing how things are just unraveling for me right now (good and not so good), but it feels like healing…I think ;/ xxxxxx
Beautiful, honest and thoughtful post Lisa.
I agree with what the others have said. Many of us feel torn in 2 directions, (I certainly do). for me i want (and need) to learn all the sales, marketing & web stuff to keep developing my business & then there’s other often more interesting things I want to learn so that I can better support my clients. And it’s hard to keep momentum in both directions.
So what I’m saying is Me Too, it’s great that you’re aware of this and I look forward to seeing what comes next.
Lesley Pyne recently posted…Three ways to be more open about being childless
Yes Lesley, This is ‘me too!!!’ in action… I mean, how on earth do we implement all that stuff….seriously! The times when things go smoother for me is when I pace myself…..so gotta learn that lesson again and again!! 😉
Thank you for this. I left my corporate life after a lifetime in it in October 2013. First time entrepreneur. Every took longer than I expected, and yet, I couldn’t rush anything. It seemed to always be the end of the day, with just a bit written, a few clients, slow slow slow.
Process takes the time it takes. Process is Feminine Consciousness, and the Feminine can’t be rushed.The Feminine is about allowing, Being, receiving, Presence. I had to learn who I was, now that the lid and the masks were coming off. I no longer had play the corporate role and yet, who was I really now, without it?
I am getting closer every day to finding myself as you will too. We need to allow and be with ourselves respectfully. You are a wonderful example of what is necessary when we shift from one path to another. Thanks so much for sharing this. Very inspiring and affirming.
Miriam Linderman recently posted…The Gift of Body-Food Issues & Why I Love Marion Woodman
It is so reassuring to see you write that the feminine consciousness cannot be rushed….and that change can take a huge amount of time. It is interesting that much of my angst was my own pressure of how far I felt I should be in my business by a certain date: like it can be shoe-horned into an acceptable period of time. I did not take into consideration, the layers of the onion, healing and undoing of deeply ingrained habits of a lifetime. I feel there is a huge need for self compassion and acknowledgement of the courage needed to take this journey of change…But, that is hard to feel ‘ in the bones’ sometimes xxxxx
An interesting and exciting time in your business development Lisa. While all the balls are up in the air there is an opportunity to do something really different.
As Lebanese/American coach Nido Qubein says “The only people who like change are babies with dirty nappies!
Your art is so beautiful and creative whatever happens next will be excellent.
Pat, Thank you. I love the quote about change…so, true. Change can be kinda exciting or not, but there is ALWAYS this tension of holding the possibility that anything can happen. Keeping the heart open, no matter what…
Lisa, I think this is why we connect, (& how lovely it is to have someone sort of local to me) ; you bring such open arm, full hearted honesty and Im very drawn to that, as it opens the space for others to be true to. Its a good time to meet others who are swimming in the same waters & finding the best way to go on the journey. My anchors dropped too these last few months. Im also feeling into how I want to express in the world via my art, my words and my vision, seeing how I am of service, whats its shape, and texture, what is that Im serving. I suppose ones voice is the one we’re most happiest sharing with others. With the work I/we do, its about sharing truth and the heart and soul of things & it takes some bravery and courage to do so – to share the vulnerability of the journey. I’ve found myself stepping away from many areas, especially online. I still need to do that for some time yet, (& as much as I like time alone, which we know is also the nature of intuitive work and art, there is nothing like finding parts of your tribe along this path). I have been finding social media to be a double edged sword for me on this part of the journey, both a place for connections and growth, but also a trigger for “not enoughness” in where I am with my work, as Im still in development, website building and service creating. I often have to step back and see into the heart of things or the noise can cancels out my own!
I like that there is more dialogue around the feminine ways, which is about connection, witnessing and natural rhythms of flow, rather than purely the old business paradigm of pure results focussing and do do do, push push push! (which is also where I came from).
I will say though, you’ve made a beautiful home here on your website in that time you’ve taken away. It certainly tells me clearly who you are ; both soft and strong. I look forward to seeing what else opens up for you from here, as you continue to calibrate that beautiful resonant energy and vision of yours.
melanie maddison recently posted…Processing the creative
Oh wow Melanie, you write so beautifully and resonate to the beat of my own heart…I could not write it any better…and thank you for your kind words. Through experiencing the more masculine energy of work, you are now embracing the more feminine way….we are on very similar journeys. Look forward to seeing you soon 😉
Yes I so agree and was thinking about this today. I want to learn more effective ways of communicating but I don’t want to lose my spontaneity or my creativity. anxiety to ‘get it right’ can so easily block my flow. Yet, I know I have much to learn.
Your website strikes just the right note for me – nothing feeling prefabricated or formula. And I love your images – every one really speaks to me.
kate wilson recently posted…Hot water spa by the sea
Oh thank you for your wonderful compliment…made my day… Yes trying to find our authentic voice takes time with lots of trials and errors 😉